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Not every opportunity is yours

The hardest limit is stepping back from good ones and seeing the ones you've already said yes to through

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Feb 17, 2026

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7 min read

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Not every opportunity is yours to take. I keep having to learn that one.

Last week I wrote about saying no to good ideas: how you hold the line for your team's priorities and make the cost of yes visible. This is the personal version. I'm the one who wants to say yes. A new initiative gets proposed, a cross-functional project needs someone, or someone's building something interesting and I want to be part of it. Most of the time there's no emergency. Just a good idea, and I want to get involved.

I've gotten feedback that I take on too much. Shiny object syndrome, manager edition: I want to fix everything and be in the room for a lot of things. The fix is deciding which opportunities are actually mine and seeing those through before I pick up the next one.

When something good is happening, it feels like impact to say "count me in." You're in the loop. You're helping. You're not the person who sat it out.

The cost shows up later. You're spread across five things. Nothing gets your full attention. You're context-switching between half-finished commitments, and the team isn't sure who owns what because you've got a hand in everything. I've been there. In the moment it feels like being useful. You only notice when you're dropping balls or realizing you never quite closed the loop on something you said you'd own.

Most of the opportunities that tempt me are good ideas. So the real question is: is this mine to take, and do I have the capacity to see it through?

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When an opportunity is yours

I don't have a perfect formula. I just run through a few checks.

  • It's in your lane and no one else can own it. Some things need your context, your authority, or your relationship. If that's true and you have capacity, step in.

  • You actually have capacity. This is my biggest struggle. That means you've finished or handed off something you were already committed to. "I'll make room" is seductive. It usually means something else slips.

  • It's one of the few things you've already said matters. If you've set priorities for the quarter or the year, does this fit? If not, saying yes means something that was a priority gets less of you.

If all three line up, yes is reasonable. If one of them doesn't, I try to pause.

When it's not yours (even if it's good)

Sometimes the opportunity is good and you still shouldn't take it.

  • Someone else can own it, and should. Stepping in can feel helpful. It can also rob someone else of the chance to lead, or teach the team that you'll always be the one to grab the ball. If it's a growth moment for someone on your team or a clear win for another lead, step back.

  • You're already at capacity. You don't have to have a dramatic excuse. "I'm at capacity" is enough. The discipline is not adding one more thing because this one is interesting.

  • Saying yes would mean not finishing something you started. This is the one I need the most. I want to say yes to the new thing. The cost is the thing I said I'd do last month that's still sitting at 80%. Finish that first. Then you can take the next opportunity.

I did this recently. Someone asked me to take the lead on an initiative I'd normally say yes to. It was a good idea, I was a natural fit, and the ask was reasonable. But I knew I was about to be out on medical leave for a stretch. Taking the lead would have meant either dropping the ball or handing it off halfway through. I said I'd contribute ideas and feedback when I could but not own it. Someone else stepped up. Stepping back didn't feel like impact, but it was the right call.

The hardest ones are when the idea is genuinely good and you'd add value. That's when it helps to have the rule: see it through first.

Mine is simple: I don't add a new opportunity until I've closed the loop on one I'm already in. Finished it, handed it off, or explicitly deprioritized it so it's not taking space in my head. I'd be lying if I said I follow this all the time, but we're all a work in progress.

When I say "not this one" or "someone else should own this," I feel like I'm holding back, not stepping up. Like I'm not doing enough. But the impact I've been asked to improve isn't "be in more things." It's "don't take on too much," which means doing fewer things and actually finishing them.

Most of the opportunities that come your way aren't emergencies. They're good ideas. Interesting projects. Chances to contribute. What actually limits you is whether you can do them well, and whether saying yes to this one means you're quietly saying no to something you already promised.

I'm still working on it. Some weeks I get it right. Some weeks I look up and I'm in too many things again. The reminder that helps: not every opportunity is yours. And the ones that are? See them through before you pick up the next.


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